LOVE by Freddy Villanes Tovar

Today (tonight)
I´m with nobody but love.
In the future
the only one I´m going to be with
will be
Love.
Love is all I need.
Not in feminine form
neither wearing skirts
neither tight jeans
neither brief clothes
Love, Love, Love and only Love.
What does it mean?
It means my freedom.
Try.
It works for me.
The presence of love  is everywhere since I´m with it.
How?
Just call it.
It will come to you dressed with pure garment.
And will touch you
softly
behind your neck.
Let it be with you all the time.
That is all.
Take my words: love is freedom not slavery
Love is joy
not pain.
Love is truth
not lies.
Believe me.
I´m a preacher of love.


Santa Anita June 3rd 2014

LOVE by Freddy Villanes Tovar

Yesterday I found out a friend was about to leave me alone.
I have a few friends, all women, in a site.
I chat with them sometimes, some I do not.
My father knows all about this.
I love all of them.
I´ve said that I am in love with a woman called Licett (it is the way her parents write it)
and my friends like to hear that.
It sound romantic.
But it is really pathetic.
I love Licett without hope.
She will never love me.
The seed is not in her.
What can I do?
Wait?
It is useless.
That is why I´m looking for love in the site I mentioned.
But it doesn´t work.
I love her.
I know my love is true.
How can I convince her about it?
No way.
Licett is impossible
for me.
I´m writing a short story for a contest.
It´s the only way to show her I´m not the fool she believes I am.
Cause I´m not.
Love is not foolish.
The friend of the site I mentioned at the beginning of this text whom I suposed lost wrote me a message: she had no intention to leave me. The internet failed: that was all.
I still keep my friends in that site.
But all of them can´t replace a little bit of mine: Licett is unique.
Tell me all you like: fool, crazy, mad, insane.
It doesn´t matter.
My love for her is my life.
Let me live with that.

Santa Anita May 23th 2014

LOVE by Freddy José Villanes Tovar.

I found Love
(after a long way that started since I began seeking
I think I found it at last)
Dou you know how or who is it?
It has the form of a woman
It is tall
Taller than me
And her name is Anastasia.
She just want to love and be loved.
She does not look for anyone in particular.
Just someone to love and be loved by him.
I can performance both roles to perfection.
I love
and wanna be loved by one.
Didn´t I tell you?
I fit in it.
Better than that:
She is beautiful
young
tender
and all the awsome adjectives you may say about a delicate woman.
Cause she is.
I told her to let me call her "My love"
I was not completely sure about it
But I run the risk
Now,
after passing all the day thinking about this LOVE with feminine form
I made up my mind.
Another feminine form that is not LOVE but FRIENDSHIP
opened my eyes, my brain and my soul.
For her (the last one) I learned that the only one that I could love is her (the first one).
And I´m prepared
for the first time in my life
to afford LOVE.
Do not go away and not so far:
this is just beginning.

Santa Anita, April 10th 2014

I STILL LOVE HER by Freddy José Villanes Tovar

I still love her
because sometimes
with no advise
and warning
I find myself saying
"I love you"
(It must be true.
I don´t know)
What does "I  love you" mean?
All my life´s been saying that:
I love you, Licett (I said it in spanish
and her name is written that way
but I know it should be written
correctly in other one)
And by saying that
I believe that I loved her
Is that true?
Did I do it?
Is Love so simple?
Just a permanent declaration?
Just some words joined together?
I did that:
Believe that I love her just because
my lips opened
and produced
that sound
so expressive
so cult
so exercised
expressing
something
with no existence.
I still find myself
in that attitude
I can not control
and repeating:
"Te amo, Licett"
(spanish version)
and do you want to know
some?
I think it is true.
No matter if reality
shows me the contrary.
The force of the expression
is so strong
nothing
can change
it.
Te amo, Licett.
I love you.
No matter what
I can say about the
meaning of that.
The meaning
is
you.
(You, my love)

April 9th 2014

POEM 9 by Freddy José Villanes Tovar.

9
It is still too early
to call "day" to the day
but it is.
Five o´clock
and
a little bit more.
Do you love anyone?
Do you?
I did.
The only one I love for thirty years.
Yesterday, in the night
I write to her my last words in that condition.
Now
the love of my life
is just
the friend of my friends.
I can´t forget the best gift she did me of all:
Happiness.
I could never give her back that present.
But I have to.

Poem 8 by Freddy Villanes Tovar.

I´m getting older day by day
like all of you.
The love I love does not exist anymore:
There is a good friend taking her place.
I loved it...
as much as I could love the best thing in the world.
But does not exist anymore.
Now it is too early here at home.
Everybody is sleeping.
(My mind can not)
If you know something I can do
tell...me.
(the wound will heal up if)

Poem 7 "LICETT"

She is my sun
she is all I have
The beginning
and the end
When I wake
up and leave
I think
of her
When I´m in lunch
the same
Can there be something more powerful than
the power
of love?
Believe me
Theres is not.

Poem 4 by Freddy José Villanes Tovar.

4

Life, lies, love.

Could be no more.

Life, lies, love.

All I can stand.

Life

(Mine)

lies

(Mine)

Love

(Mine too)

Can´t stand

anymore.

¿Do you?

Poem 2 by Freddy José Villanes Tovar.

2

I love what I love

I could pretend more:

look for

every where

But it´s not me.

(Could be someone I used to be in the past)

But I love you now

and enough

or little

it´s mine.

As Blanquita rests (and I think of her) by Freddy José Villanes Tovar.

 Blanquita (mom) rests laying on her bed:

Her hands have the color of the sand

(I know how to count the days)

(I know and I´ve learned

that you don´t love me)

(I know when you make a wound

in my side and laugh)

(but I love you)

(because you smell good...

because you are pretty..

because you speak of sparrows

and butterflies)

(But above all I´ve said, because I´m

just a fool..

a big one..who endure you)

Let´s forget it..(it´s so hot in the city and smells gasoline everywhere)

Here I am remebering you..

"Hitting" my head on the wall because I did not tell you

(among other things)

what you know that I want from you.

It´s late: Dad scapes out to the streets (he says he goes for shopping

but Blanquita and I know

the color of nostalgia

in the afternoon

as the years pass by)

I love you (I´m goin to do it always beacause I have nothing else to do

and because the life has the same color of your eyes -black-and because

the world is made of something that the common people calls "imposibles" and

I call "misteries")

Good bye, Miss "misteries"

keep the perfume of your body,

take to others the fragance of your nights

and think a little bit in this "adventurer"

(Mom is silent, unbelievable; but she´s not sleeping;

just resting as giving me time to write this...)

Lord (by Freddy José Villanes Tovar)

Don´t know why


I found Him

Mom pushed me some way into

But He did all the rest.

Conceited, I failed

once and more,

Years and years

I did not learn.

Until now:

Mom's ill..

Dad's old.

I´ll be lone soon.

I did not take precautions about it.

But God?

What is..Who is...How?

Again and again I wondered and wondered

until one night

when mother could not fall asleep (and it was too late)

I whispered softly:

"Please, My God, help me, help my mother, I´m yours"

And it happened:

He appeared ...

"Lord, God...."

I´m your child,

we all are...

And then I did not have to look for anything anymore:

He´s come

To stay...

(It's Sunday

Sun shines

I write

You read

All is connected.)

My love is with you.